Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Users are losers and losers are users; So don't use drugs...

This may not entertain anyone here since none of ya'll really work in the tech support industry. However, over my many years in this field, I have narrowed the main types of users that there are. There are many many more than these 3, but yesterday, I carried a heavy computer from the one end of campus to the other (the furthest distance you would have to walk) and got stopped by 3 of the folllowing users...

1) The "follow up in person" user. This user will get an email that is pretty straight forward, then reply to you. Typically, the transaction is finished here, however, when this user sees you in person, they find it the perfect time to continue the email conversation as though it has not yet stopped.

Example: I send out an email to all users warning them about a new danger in AOLs instant messenger. I referenced a web link and told them how to avoid getting the virus. One user replies (Even though no reply was needed) explaining to me how she doesn't use it at work but does at home. Confused, I tell her to be careful at home. A day later I am lugging a heavy computer and we cross paths, I nod, she waves. Then I hear her call my name from behind. Surely this is an emergency, she certainly sees me carrying this heavy load. Oh no, not so. She says "What's the deal with that AOL virus thing?" Befuddled by the question, I ask "You read my email...?" She replies "Yes, but I have used AOL for years and never had a problem." I literally stumbled over my words, while trying to keep the computer held up in my hands... she stood resolute, waiting an explanation to which I reploed "Just don't click links that people send you in aol." and I walked on.

2) The "I know you are busy but I just have one quick question" user.

Sure, all questions are quick, but when everyone stops you in the hall while you are carrying a 30 pound box, there is no such thing as a quick question...
"If I bring a printer from home, can we put it on my classroom computer?"
"Sure, no problem, just email me to remind me"
"I was just about to do that! Thanks so much!"
I'm thinking "So had you not seen me in the hall, you would have never had the opportunity to ask me this question? And if you were about to email me, and saw I was busy and straining to hold up this computer, why did you stop me?"

FYI, I have yet to get an email from her...

3) The "Pick up where we left off" user...

Occationally, teachers will solicite me to fix thier personal computers. I am cool with it as long as they bring it to me and I dont have to come to their house. About a week ago, one teacher come to my office explaining a problem she was having with her PC at home. I told her to bring it in and I would look at it. The day I was carrying this computer, she stops me and says (No joke) "Yeah, i called dell and they couldnt figure it out..."
"sweating, and straining, I readjust the computer in my arms and look at her confused and say "What are you talking about again...?"

she refreshes my memory...

Needless to say, yesterday about 9am (about 24 hours after this long haul) I pulled a muscle in my back from literally doing nothing... it just hit me. $20 doctor copay and a $20 pharmacy copay later, I have muscle relaxers in my bathroom....

I almost want to send out an email saying "If you see me carrying something, please dont stop me in the hall. I have pulled a muscle in my back due to such actions this week." But of course, I wont...

Workers comp?

5 comments:

bigsip said...

Dude! I feel for you, but that's a really funny story!

Honestly, though, I'm sorry you got hurt.

Next time, just drop the box on their toes.

JS said...

i actually did dropped one on my foot a few months ago... had to fill out workers comp stuff, but i suffered no real injury form it.

bigsip said...

Take an empty case and fill it with a bunch of broken phone and computer junk and start across campus.

When some one stops you, drop it on their feet.

It'd be fun to do, but you'd probably get sued or hurt yourself or something.

tnmommieof2 said...

you poor dear!! i have that same problem when i am carrying coin out of the vault...getting stopped with 2 $500 boxes of quarters in your hands is not fun!!!

i do feel your pain dahlin!!!

mullinz8 said...

You should be an empty computer tower and fill it with junk parts making sure it won’t open if dropped. Carry it across campus a few times until you’ve been stopped enough and find that one person you really want to lay a heavy guilt trip on. As that person is blabbing on start to fidget. Suddenly drop it tower ensuring those loose pieces tumble around to cause a nasty racket. Just look at the person with a strained expression and quickly tell them you’ve got to go and hope you have a job next week. Maybe that will stop people from bugging you when you’re actually busy.