Monday, January 29, 2007

O Thou Lying Girgashite!

While doing a little surfing, I stumbled upon a Biblical Curse Generator. It says that it takes it is loaded with "blistering put-downs as delivered by Elijah, Jeremiah and other monumentally angry saints," but I'm pretty sure most of them are made up.

Whether it is actual scripture or not, it is pretty stinking funny.

Here's a few of my favorites:

"Harken, O ye discourager of the brethren, for you will go on a diet of crunchy,
unsweetened locusts!"

"May you be as welcome as a fart in the queen's bedchamber, thou irritating inhabitant of Gath!"

"Behold, thou shalt be pursued into the mountains by sex-mad baboons, O thou babbling Assyrian!"

"Thou shalt become as popular as a boil on the king's backside, O thou whose name is but dung!"

3 comments:

Jamison said...

Ive often wondered about the seriousness of a curse (or blessing).

What is a curse, what is a blessing? I suppose a toast at a wedding is a blessing.

I would never wish to curse someone, but would "blessing" someone work much like prayer?

CL said...

That is absolutely hilarious!

bigsip said...

I look at a "blessing" as someone who is close to God (elders, preacher, older christian, etc.) actually proclaiming a hopeful discourse upon someone. It's not done nearly enough in my opinion.