Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Cat Wake-up Call

Sorry to interupt the baby talk, but this is semi-appropritate as a cat is as close to having a baby as I'm going to have...for awhile.

I no longer need an alarm clock anymore for I have a cat. Every morning anywhere from 6 to 8 in the am, my cat Thumbelina, decides it is time for me to get up. Her first measure of offense to get me out of bed is simple pouncing. She jumps up onto my bed, and then onto my body, usually with another jump.

If she is lucky this is met with a simple “umph” from myself, followed by a gentle swat to get her off of me.


If my wife is not so lucky, Thumbelina dodges my swat with a giant leap off of me and onto the wife’s belly. This is followed by a large “oooooowwwww!” from my wife and a not so gentle swat to the cat.


This usually gets rid of the cat for ten minutes or so.


Just like a snooze alarm, she comes back for more.


Often the jumping/swatting routine is repeated several times. As I ease into awaked-ness I am less likely to swat the cat away as to simply let her be. What this means for the cat is that she begins to crawl across my body.


I am typically a side sleeper, as sleeping on my belly isn’t comfortable and sleeping on my back makes me snore and gives me nightmares. So, the cat tends to start somewhere near my middle, crawling across my hips onto my ribcage and sometimes up to my shoulders. Most of this is quite uncomfortable and eventually I make the roll over to get her off which usually makes Thumbelina jump onto Amy again and we start the snooze process all over again.


After all of this Thumbelina still has one more move to get me out of bed. She no longer tries to walk on me to get me up, but rather nuzzles up beside me. Take this morning for example – after jumping on me a time or two she crept up towards my hands and gently bumped them with her head.


Thumbelina is very much a lap-cat and when she cannot find a lap on which to cuddle, she rubs her head gently upon a part of my body. While lying in bed early this morning, this is exactly what she did to my hand – with a little nasty addendum.


She nuzzles the hand briefly as if to let me know she means no harm, and then she brings out the claws. Internally I’m thinking – oh how nice a little head but to let me know she loves me – and then she scratches the crap out of me.


Actually it isn’t too bad a scratch as more of a letting me know she can get violent if I don’t get up soon. Like a trained killer she doesn’t scratch my skin to leave any evidence, but gives me just enough pain to give me a warning.


This garners a pretty big swat. But she isn’t through. Oh no, if I am still not up she comes back with more head cuddles and menacing scratches.


At this point I either throw her out of the room and shut the door (knowing full well she will only scratch at the door) or I actually get up and feed her or let her outside or do whatever it is she wants.


She’s a crafty one that cat of mine.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

just don't take her to China or she'll get eaten...
-sip

Jamison said...

I cant read the first line for some reason

Mat Brewster said...

"Sorry to interupt the baby talk, but this is semi-appropritate as a cat is as close to having a baby as I'm going to have...for awhile."

Jamison said...

so... Cat 1 - Brewster 0?

or more like Cat 247 - Brew 0?

Mat Brewster said...

I think I got a point in during the Clinton administration.

We now have two cats, as we've been keeping my in-laws very old cat, Jazz, while they have been out of home. It has been an interesting two weeks watching them try to figure out who is dominant.

Jamison said...

Ah, much like the classic Brewster-Braly struggle of '98

Jamison said...

just occured to me that the cat's gray hair gives him a sort of Phantom of the Opera-esque mask look

Amy Brewster said...

I can only say that this story is true. And that I am glad when Mat is home and all this kitty attention is focused primarily on him.
Our other kitty Jazz simply sits in the hallway and waits to be served like royalty. If that doesn't work, he gives a royal meow and nips at bare ankles.

Amy Brewster said...

no kitties to China--even though it breaks my heart to leave her.

Jamison said...

One of out midnight frriends has a birthday coming up...

CL said...

oh cats, nothing like a 4am wake up call...we get em too - errrr!

Anonymous said...

I love cats...they're delicious!

Who's having a bday? Mine is August 15th...

-sip