I've done a lot of soul searching lately. Knowing you have time limitations and trying to find employment is stressful (many of you understand). Since I've started looking, I've lost 25 pounds. I've even tried to start eating more lately and it doesn't seem to help. I've needed to loose the weight, but now I can't say it's because I diet and exercise. It's because of stress.
I've looked high and low for a good job. Something that even pays close to 2/3 what I make now. Pensacola is not an easy market to crack. Maybe I've been too picky, but I know there are certain things I would not want to do. I think the problem has been, that the one thing I don't want to do everybody wants me to do.
I've been praying a lot lately. Talking to God has given me a great deal of peace. Although he has not answered my prayer for a job yet, he has quickly given me hope every time I've asked. Specifically, when I've been down, I've asked him to just send an interview along, just to keep my spirits up. He's answered in the affirmative every time, generally the same or very next day. He's waiting for something; it could very well be me. I've tossed around:
1) Maybe I've done something wrong
2) Maybe I'm supposed to finish something first.
3) Maybe I'm not listening
4) Maybe it's just not time, etc.
For those who don't know, I've been given until June 30th by Dave to find something. After that I'm on my own. Jodi and I have sold our house and we are renting it back until then or until I find employment. If June 30th comes close and no Job is in sight, we are moving regardless. There is no reason to stay here. Jodi's Job is based in Pensacola anyway. And at least down there I can more actively search.
I've prayed that God would not let it come to this, but He may have other plans. All I can do is trust Him. And try to be patient.